Yesterday, the munchkins and parents came over after church for ‘Santa brunch’ as J called it and to exchange Christmas gifts. I had bought the girls adorable footie pajamas and Amare a musical vacuum cleaner. (Oh, yeah. I’m gonna be that person that buys the loud, obnoxious educational gifts for kids.) Then, because I wasn’t convinced that was enough, I made each of the kids cute lil fleece blankets for each of them. I wasn’t overly sure they’d like them, but after seeing them curled up with them as soon as brunch was over, I really had no doubt. Plus, aren’t these the cutest kids in the history of all cute kids.

I’ve always considered myself to be a math person, so I should have realized this bloggin’ everyday thing would eventually lead to a large number of posts.  However, when I noticed a few days ago that I was approaching the big 5-0-0, it was more of a suprise than it should have been.  Let’s not tell Mr. Laduke (my HS math teacher) that I’ve slipped so far down the arithmatic chain, k?  With my ankle propped up and icing (see, Mom, I am taking care of myself) I spent a few hours this evening reading back again through the last year and a half of my life, and as much as I’m still Laurel, I find hope in the growth and change that has happened.  So to commemorate this slightly momentous posting occasion, I thought I’d share back with you five of my favorite/truest/funniest posts of our time together.

5)  Happy Birthday, Spacewolf!  (Zac’s 25th Birthday video)

4) My mom’s love of telling time, my dad’s ADD confessions, and Zac’s pranks… humor… and awesomeness.

3)  The time I was called a lesbian, saw Ryan Adams and The Cardinals, John Mayer, Ingrid, the Crows and Matty Nay to name a few, fed the masses, begged my bffs take over, and celebrated my 27th in style.

2) Written back at the beginning of the great CaresTeam departure/Laurel moving out on her own.

Change is still headed my way. I’m still gonna have moments of complete and utter collapse, and what needs to happen in the next few months will still overwhelm me. But, I’ve stopped playing the reality peek-a-boo game because I know that time marches on whether or not you want it to. For now, let’s go ahead and schedule a time this fall where we can all sit back and laugh at my drama queen distress today. We’ll watch the Arizona sun set as we sip iced tea, and I won’t be offended when you remind how we all knew deep down… it would be okay.

Say it with me now… you were right. It was/ok better than ok.

1) The great Charlie abduction, ransom note, detective work, and New World Order video.

Best opening season of the season.  It has to rank up there with the infamous Jim dresses as Dwight opening.

It’s funny. Usually by this time in the year, I’ve got a peppermint mocha in my hand, and Christmas music blaring from all nearby speakers. Sure, my house is decorated for the holidays and pretty stinkin’ cute if I say so myself. My shopping is all done, and my Christmas cards are ready to mail. But beyond my repeated watchings of Elf (my favorite Will Ferrell movie) and without the presence of that white, flaky stuff (snow for all of you in the rest of Arizona), I’m just not feeling the season yet. It really doesn’t help either that the stores started playing holiday tuneage after Halloween. I mean I love ‘I’ll be home for Christmas’ but have no desire to sing it seven weeks before I’ll actually be home. So today’s musical offering or early Christmas present is the playlist that is currently filling the musical spaces of my life. Maybe by next week, we’ll get to talk about the joys of Christmas music and singing carols, hopefully:)

David Archuleta- Crush: Don’t hate. There’s a reason this kid was the American Idol runner-up. “Do you catch a breath when I look at you? Are you holding back like the way you do? ‘Cause I’m trying, trying to walk away. But I know this crush ain’t goin’ away.”

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Missy Higgins – Where I Stood:  “And I won’t be far from where you are if ever you should call. You meant more to me then any one I’ve ever loved at all. But you taught me how to trust myself . And so I say to you, this is what I have to do.”

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Kanye West – Heartless: Kanye is 2008′s ambassador to the 80s. “In the night I hear them talk. The coldest story ever told. Somewhere far along this road, he lost his soul to a woman so heartless. How could you be so heartless?”

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Jennifer Hudson – Spotlight: (GO WATCH the video.  NOW.) “Well, I don’t like living under your spotlight just because you think I might find somebody worthy.”

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Adele – Chasing Pavements: Oh, Adele.  If things go as I hope, this songbird will walk away with at least one Grammy this spring.  (fingers crossed) “Should I give up or should I just keep chasing pavements? Even if it leads nowhere? Or would it be a waste even if I knew my place?”

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John Mayer – Clarity/Lost Remix: Mayer covering Coldplay might be blasphemy to some but not me. “Just because I’m hurting doesn’t mean I’m hurt.  Doesn’t mean I didn’t get what I deserve. No better and no worse.”

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Estelle – American Boy: With just enough Kanye to make it right.  “I really want to come kick it with you.  You’ll be my American boy.”

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Ray LaMontagne – Let It Be Me: How can you not fall in love with this man’s voice… “That’s when you need someone, someone that you can call.  And when all your faith is gone, feels like you cant go on.  Let it be me.”

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Pink – Sober: Sure, she might beat the crap out of you in a dark alley.  But the emotion in her voice while she did it would so make it worth it. “I’m safe up high.  Nothing can touch me. But why do I feel this party’s over?”

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So it’s been roughly 72 hours since the awesomeness of my swan dive to the pavement, and my ankle is finally a lil less swollen.  Of course with a decrease in swelling comes an increase in bruising, but at least I’m lucky and loe pink and purple! (Ignore the lighting. It’s a camera phone!)

So about halfway through the day yesterday, I remembered that I had promised the munchkins’ parents I would once again hang out at their house when the dad left for work and before the mom got home from her basketball game. Needless to say, I wasn’t thrilled at my commitment, but it was a commitment I needed to fulfill busted ankle or not. After bundling up for the artic weather and packing my purse full of drugs, an iPod and headphones, and a book to keep me occupied, I headed across town with the selfish hope that all of the kiddos would be fast asleep.  It’s not that I don’t adore them.  It’s just I was exhausted, and my ankle was aching.  Of course, I wasn’t that lucky.  The middle munchkin was still awake and ready to play when I got there.  After saying goodbye to her dad and promising she’d go to bed soon (not that she has any concept of soon), she turned to me in expectation of etertainment.  First, she wanted my phone to text her boyfriend.  When I denied her that, she then proceded to remind me I was single and, therefore, did not need a cell phone.  This kid is good!  Then she went and chose three books for me to read her in the dark and didn’t let me in on the fact she had them memorized and would point out every mistake I made.  Finally, I gave up and grabbed my iPod and put the earbuds in her ears.  It’s amazing after a lil Beyonce and Jesse McCartney she was ready for bed.  Thank goodness!!

So last night I’m leaving work heading to my car when I step off the concrete ledge onto the pavement between my car and another. Except instead of there being flat, wonderfully solid pavement there is a huge crack and pothole in the solid ground I wasn’t expecting.  Needless to say, my right ankle rolled and popped under me, and I face-planted it.  I must have sat on the ground in the dark between two cars crying for what seemed like an hour but was probably ten minutes wiling myself to stand up and begging my ankle to stop throbbing.  Eventually, I hobbled to my car unlocked the door and crawled to safety, but driving with my busted right foot wasn’t going to happen.  So I did the only logical thing… I drove home with my left.  After the slowest three mile drive of my life, I finally made it home and into my bed to survey the damage.  Upon seeing how swollen it had become so quickly, I called Cory, and after a quick game of phone tag, he was on his way to help me decide if I needed to be hospital bound.  With a quick consult of WebMD, we decided it was probably just a sprain, and ice and elevation with a side of multiple episodes of House and some good company/nursing was what any doctor would have called for to be better by morning.

Sleep did not come easily, and by the time I woke up this morning, I had zero mobility and could barely even stand.  When it took me over an hour to get to the bathroom, get dressed, brush my hair, and put my hair in a ponytale, I realized that maybe I needed to seek medical attention.  Once again, Cory saved the day and chauffeured me to the ER.  Lucky for me, the place was almost empty at just after 8am, and I was back in radiology within 15 minutes of arriving.  After repeating ‘no, I’m not pregnant’ at least four times, x-rays were taken and I was headed to a room.  Somehow I should have known that being put in a room so quickly would not end as well as I had hoped, but my judgement was so clouded with pain that I didn’t find it as odd as I should have when the nurse instructed me to undress for my full exam.  I’m sure somewhere in the back of my brain an alarm usually would have been going off that ankle injuries do not require clothes-less exams, but the batteries had died in that alarm when I ate pavement last night.

So like a good patient (something I rarely am) I disrobed and went to put on the gown they had left me.  Have you ever seen Tommy Boy???  Remember the Fat Guy In A Lil Coat scene.  Well, welcome to my gown experience. This gown was small, but I followed orders and shoved my arms through the arm holes like a dutiful child.  However, there was not enough fabric to cover my chest.  So while the gown was on, my arms were sticking straight out the front, and my back was left completely exposed.  Looking like some freak, one-legged robot, I climbed into bed to wait.  Twenty minutes and a round of text messages to family and friends to let them know where I was later, the nurse came back in with a chart in hand looked at me and then the chart before confessing that there had been a patient mix-up.  Since I did not have a kidney stone and wasn’t twelve years old, I could put my clothes back on, and my real doctor (not the kidney one but the ankle one) would be in shortly.

The next hour was spent looking at my films (no breaks), prepping me with an air cast for my severely sprained ankle with minor ligament damage, and teaching me how to use crutches properly.  Mmmm an air cast and crutches, what a great way to spend the holidays!  To make a long story a tad bit shorter with Cory’s help, I made it to work for over five hours (haha to taking 3-4 days off of work) and am now resting with my leg elevated and ice on my ankle.  Just to prove that I’m not making it all up, I’m including pictures of my awesome ankle, badass crutches, and soon to be pink air cast.  I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again… who wouldn’t wanna be me?!?!

My ankle this am. Notice the awesome swelling and bruising. If only I could find an eyeshadow in that pretty lavender shade.

Who wants to help decorate my air cast??? I bought it. Might as well, Laurel-fy it.

Oh, hospital wristband. Truly the perfect accessory to wear to an interview you’re helping conduct. Nothing says, ‘wanna come work with us’ like the chance that your newest coworker has just escaped from the hospital.

I was at work today trying to catch up before a daunting week of evaluations and interview when my phone obnoxiously beeped and vibrated with a picture message. The following conversation was too funny to not share.

Zac (pix message): I can’t wait to blog!

(My picture from kindergarten.)
Me: Hahah
Z: I forgot I had an older brother
L: That’s horrible
L : You are so mean.
Zac calls, and I answer it too late. So he continues texting.
Z: I’m sorry.
Z: Please call.
I call and the conversation continues on the phone.
L: You’re so mean.
Z: I found it while decorating for Christmas.
L: It’s painful, I know.
Z: It’s ok. Everyone goes through an awkward stage. Yours was just an angry lesbian one.
At least two straight minutes of simultaneous laughter to the point of tears.
L: (Some inside PTC joke.)
Z: No one should have ever cut your hair that way.
L: Talk about making my face look perfectly round. Blame mom.
Z: Miss you.
L: Miss you too.
We say our goodbyes and hang up
Z(text): I love you.
L: Love you too.
Z: That was the best laugh I’ve had in a long time.
L: I was crying
Z:

No wonder he’s my best friend in the whole world. No one else could get away with that and, instead of inspiring anger, have me laughing.

It’s been ten years since the entertainment phenomenon of Britney Spears arrived on the scene, and since then the world has been obsessed with her every waking moment. Last night after a busy week and busier weekend, Lauren and I finally sat down to watch the DVRed Britney Spears: For The Record documentary on MTV, and after watching I feel nothing but pity for her. Sure, she chose fame and made the choices that brought her to the place she is in, but that in no way means, I have the right to find pleasure in her pain.

The truth is if people didn’t read the tabloids or buy the magazines, Britney’s story would be different. I won’t lie… I’ve made fun of her in the past. Laughed at her 2007 VMA performance… stared bewildered at her shaved head… enjoyed watching the mighty fall. But after watching her, I can’t help but wonder when did I become so calloused that the brokenhearted (no matter who they are or how much they’re worth) don’t affect me anymore?

On the latest album of Bebo Norman (one of my favorite Christian artists), Norman wrote a song specifically for Britney as an apology to what we as the world have done to her and young women as a whole. We’ve taken everything that should matter as a person and replaced it with superficial fluff, and now we wonder why our 12 year-olds look 16. I’m just as much to blame as the next person, but I’m hoping the next time I start to find joy in someone else’s misfortune I’ll remember this song… and the broken girl we’ve created.

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New girl crush alert!!!! Kristin Wiig from Saturday Night Live. Maybe it’s because I’ve been watching it more lately or maybe it’s actually funny again. Either way, this girl is hilarious!

I’ve been contemplating what albums would make my Top Eight of 2008 list here when I ran across this helpful guide on one of my favorite music blogs. #4 and 5 are my favorites.  Stay tuned for my official list closer to the end of the year.

Last night after dinner and Fringe/House I headed over to my favorite munchkins house to babysit them until their mom got home from her team’s basketball game in Phoenix while their dad went to work. I didn’t expect to see the kids at all since it was after 9pm when I got there, but I should have known better. Lil Miss M had stayed up to see me, and her dad had giver her permission to hang out with me for an extra hour before she had to go to bed. While telling me a story about getting into trouble at her daycare, she started making the funniest face ever. When she realized how much I laughed at her she whispered in my ear that she had been practicing her faces if I wanted to see them. She then told me to take her picture and when I confessed I didn’t hvae my camera she reminded me my phone took pictures. Too smart for her own good, I tell ya!

I’m a horrible Christmas gift giver.  I shop all year round and then spend the weeks leading up to Christmas forcing myself to NOT give everyone’s gifts to them early.  This year is no different except my biggest struggle is giving one of the gifts away.  A few days ago “Infinity Blues” Ryan Adams’ first book arrived in my mailbox four months before you can buy it at your local bookstore (thank you internet pre-ordering), and I made the mistake of opening it and starting to read some of his writings.  Now I can’t seem to put it down.  The only way I’m actually going to be able to give it away is if I wrap it up tonight and deliver it early.  Before I do I thought I’d share one of my favorite excerpts from IB.

Aplomb

since nobody is listening
I will sing this
aplomb
aplomb
I’m singing that song
but I am not dignified
without dignity
I am alone
and no one is listening

this is MY hillside,
my right and left
sky and tree line barren
white canvas
north and south
devoid of color
listless
totally shut-mouth

since nobody is listening
I will sing this
over myself
over myself
and the thump of my own heart
kicking my chest
beating it
with its blood-fist
aplomb
aplomb
aplomb
aplomb
aplomb
I am alone
I am alone
and
no one is listening

-Ryan Adams

It’s a sad day in Laurelland.  My big iPod went to be with Jesus late this afternoon, and the mourning has officially begun.  I’m not as devastated about losing the physical hardware as I am about losing the 51 amazing playlists I had created in our time together.  Do you know how long it takes to create the perfect sing-a-long or rainy day playlist?  Years, I tell you! It was especially difficult to whittle down my gigabytes of John Mayer and Ryan Adams to only three a piece.  But just like when buying a new puppy after the loss of a faithful companion, I need time to heal before I even think about bringing a new iPod into the family.  I need to be sure that not only will it meet my portable musical needs but that it will place nice with the other three members of my iPod family.  Most of you might think that that’s pathetic or insane, I just call it good mothering.