While it seems too soon after my trip to SD to ask for time off, I headed to Willcox last night for the next four or so days.  You see, my mom’s finally having foot surgery, and while I’m confident she doesn’t need me there… I need to be there.  It’s a daughter thing.  There will be no guest bloggers this time around.  I couldn’t bear to have to ask another favor of them, so you may just have to wait for new posts if there is no internet to steal at my parents’ house.  Unless that is, I creep in the Super8 parking lot and steal their internet.  I wonder if that would make me a ‘webmo’. Hmm…

One of the saddest facts of music today is the number of amazing artists who go overlooked by the majority who insist on focusing on MTV’s ‘pop stars’. Since the first time I heard Rachel Yamagata she has been one of those who naturally burn so bright beyond the spotlight of the Britney and Christina’s. Her latest album “Elephant… Teeth Sinking In” has yet to leave the cd player in my car since I acquired it, and as much as I love all 15 songs, there is one single song on the album that I am obsessed with, “Elephants”.  The simple piano, mournful cello, and gut-wrenching lyrics are hard to deny, and in true Laurel fashion, I’ve had it on repeat for seven days.  Somewhere in the midst of a typical lunch conversation yesterday, two friends and I made the observation that two of us were drawn to music that was poetic in its lyrics, while the other focused more on the emotions and feelings evoked from the instruments.  Yamagata has the ability to influence both classes of music lovers, but not with what she says or plays but in what isn’t spoken.  The silent pauses between each phrase and lingering chords are the tools she uses to masterfully guide the listener into her private world.  Instead of presenting you with her newest album in its entirety, I’m hoping that if I give you a taste you’ll go out and buy the whole thing.

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Elephants:

If the elephants have past lives yet are destined to always remember
It’s no wonder how they scream. Like you and I, they must have some temper
And I am dreaming of them on the planes, dirtying up their beds,
Watching for some sign of rain to cool their hot heads

And how dare that you send me that card
When I am doing all that I can do
You are forcing me to remember
When all I want is just forget you

If the tiger shall protect her young, then tell me how did you sleep by?
Oh, my instincts have failed me for once. I must have slept the whole night
And I am dreaming of them with their kill, tearing it all apart
Blood dripping from their lips and teeth sinking into heart

And how dare that you say you’ll call
When you know I need some peace of mind
If you have to take sides with the animals
Won’t you do it with one who is kind?

If the hawks in the trees need the dead
If you are living you don’t stand a chance
You can lie there and say you are fed
But there are only two ends to this dance

You can flee with your wounds just in time
Or lie there as he feeds,
Watching yourself ripped to shreds and laughing as you bleed

So for those have you falling in love
Keep it kind, keep it good, keep it right
Throw yourself in the mist of danger
But keep an eye open at night

My all-time favorite Rachel song : Reasons Why

It’s Wednesday, the proverbial ‘hump day’.  The day you know if you can just survive it’s smooth sailing to the weekend.  It’s the day you dominate and walk away from home free.  It’s not supposed to be the day that leaves you weary and exhausted in your bed.  It’s not supposed to take more than you have to give.  It’s just not supposed to.

No one told this Wednesday those were the rules.  Nope, instead it was waiting for me as I woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.  My favorite shirt wasn’t clean.  I couldn’t fine one of my shoes.  My morning Starbucks run took 27 minutes where usually I’m in and out in 6.  An awkward lunch encounter.  Worrying about things I have no control over.  Impatience with the undefined.  A prize fighter with no opponent but myself.

Most days I probably would have laughed it all off.  Chalked it up to winning some and losing others.  I had the best friends in the world cheering me up until the point that they realized their efforts were in vain.  I couldn’t focus on more than two things at once.  I forgot my parents’ anniversary.  I didn’t feel sweet and nice, and no amount of pink, caffeine, or Mayer was going to change that.

So at 11:56pm, consider this my white flag of surrender but don’t count me out.  There’s always tomorrow.

Just purchased 12 of these (mini lightsaber keychains) bad boys for my student workers for Christmas. They are gonna be so thrilled. Now just gotta find something as equally cool for the other 30 of them who won’t be getting these.

I’m not quite sure how it happened, but one of the funniest movies of my generation didn’t thrill me the first time I watched it. It must have been my mood or the company I was in but I remember sitting through 40 Year-Old Virgin thinking ‘kill me now’. Now that I think about it, I don’t think I even made it through half of the movie. Ready to succumb to the pressures of Cory and Lauren to finally rewatch this cinema classic, Cory and I finally watched it last night, and holy crap is that movie hilarious! I won’t talk much about it because I’m guessing most of you have seen it, and this is old news to you. However, this just goes to prove my belief that so much of your experiences in life are not actually what you see and do but who you experience it with. Even the worst situation can be amazing with the right people beside you. Plus, 40 YOV has TONS of Michael McDonald and NOTHING is better than that. If you haven’t seen it, it’s worth a watch or two. PS – Don’t forget to check out the ‘extras’ on the dvd… perfecto!

Favorite Quote: “I don’t care. Anything! I would rather – I would rather watch “Beautician And The Beast”. I would rather listen to Fran Drescher for eight hours than have to listen to Michael McDonald. Nothin’ against him, but if I hear “Yah Mo B There” one more time, “Yah Mo” burn this place to the ground.”

How is it no matter what happens within the 48 hours I consider ‘my weekend’, I never feel like I accomplished enough.  I worked 10 hours, baked 15 dozen cookies, and put my house back in order.  I took a soul’s vacation and spent time with two of my closest friends.  I made three throw blankets to keep my student workers warm in the winter months.  I talked to Ms. Bee on the phone and had brunch with a dear, family friend.  What I wouldn’t give for a Sunday night where there isn’t a single thing that I can think of that didn’t get done, but instead I have a simple inner plea for just a few more hours.  Something tells me no matter how many more extra hours I would get, I would still need more.

In just a few days, Ryan Adams and The Cardinals will be releasing Cardinology, their newest album. True to RA’s ecclectic ways, he’s taking to twitter and blogs to pave the way for this momentous occasion. Recently, he posted this comic/story of the first single of the album, “Fix It”. I wish I could explain it, but well it’s Ryan Adams. That’s all you really need to know.

Love the song and the video.  Say what you want, but this girl is truly talented.  This song will be in my head for days.

Convincing college kids that giving up a few hours of their precious free time is not one of the easiest parts of my job. Most of the time I have to bribe them with some form of a prize or reward. With the semester almost half-way over, it’s time for student staff meetings again and I’m equipped with my fluffy chocolate chip cookies and my new favorite Dreamsicle Delights.

Dreamsicle Delights

1 cup Tang orange drink mix
1 1/2 cups granulated sugar
3 1/4 cups all-purpose flour
1 tsp. baking soda
1 tsp. baking powder
1 cup butter
2 eggs
2 tsp. vanilla extract
3 cups white chocolate/vanilla baking chips

-Beat together all ingredients, except the vanilla chips.
-Stir in vanilla chips.
-Drop by Tablespoonfuls onto ungreased baking sheet.
-Bake in a 350 degree oven for 12-14 minutes.

Growing up my brother and my lives were greatly enriched by two amazing women, Titi Minnie and Titi Pat.  College friends who’d wound up in Willcox teaching, Pat and Minnie were placed in the lives of my parents at just the right time. Pat, the opinionated and strong-willed Arkansas native, coached with my dad in his early years of teaching, while Minnie, the sweet and patient Puerto Rican, taught with my mom in a nearby school. From as far back as I can remember, the Titis (auntie in Puerto Rico) were an integral part of our lives. Mom, Zac and I traveled with Minnie until Zac and I went to kindergarten, and Pat was well… Pat.

Now at 27, I’ve found myself becoming a ‘titi’ to my favorite munchkins.  We go to the movies; they have toys they keep at my house.  I kidnap them so that we can celebrate birthdays, first day of school, and other big life moments.  I spoil them rotten and then take them back to their parents’ house.  But for the first time I realize something about my Titis when I think about my munchkins.  It’s not about baby-sitting or helping out the parental figures as much as they did.  No, they were there for us and cared for us because they adored us and we adored them, and that’s a legacy I hope to keep.

I read this article two weeks ago on one of my favorite blogger’s sites and have been meaning to share it with you since that day.  It always amazes me how sometimes it’s the littlest moments in our lives that have the most impact on the world around us.  It’s that thought that encourages me to keep lovin’ and livin’.  If you have a few minutes in your Tuesday, I highly recommend reading this article (make sure you have a few Kleenex).

The Cab Ride I’ll Never Forget by Kent Nerburn

You won’t hear me say this very often, but I am sorry and was wrong.  There was a time in recent history that I made fun of a certain brother for his ‘musical appreciation’ of Taylor Swift.  Sure, “Tim McGraw” was a cute song, but then came “Teardrops On My Guitar” and its painful pop remixes on every freakin’ radio station.  I ignored her next few singles (to heal, of course) until that fateful live performance of “Should’ve Said No”.  Suddenly, I was paying attention.  This girl is really good.  Unlike Zac who hates anything I like (cough John Mayer cough), I can’t wait for her Sophomore release that’s dropping in November, “Fearless”.  (For fun, ask Zac about the time I told him I’d read on Wikipedia that her new song “Love Story” was written for Joe Jonas and not him. MELTDOWN!!!)  But, I’m supposed to be apologizing and not instigating here.  So for Zac and the rest of you, here’s my “I was wrong and really heart Tay Tay, too” apology gift, her newest song “White Horse”.  Hope you enjoy.

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This should be arriving on my doorstep very soon in the form of a cotton candy pink hoodie for those dreary winter days, and all the proceeds go to support Breast Cancer research.  How awesome is that!!!  A few of my friends bought one, too.  So as soon as we all have them on at the same time, I’ll snap a picture for ya!

I never miss my hometown more than I do in the fall. At least once a year, Mom and I head out to Apple Annie’s for peaches, handmade goodies and the best apples in Arizona. A few more miles down Ft Grant Road and you can go on a hayride, pick the perfect carving pumpkin, and purchase tons of other homegrown vegetables. This year for the first time Apple Annie’s has created a massive corn-maze, the largest in our fine state.  When Zac told me about it, I was amazed at the detail an eighteen-acre field.  So if you happen to be heading east past Tucson and need a fun family activity, take a detour past my hometown and see what Apple Annie’s has to offer.

I’ve been back from Montana almost two weeks, and it seems like forever since I was there surrounded by people I love.  Work has been just that… work.  Hours have been long.  Lists of things that HAVE to be done just continue to grow longer, and I haven’t really had a moment to let my trip really digest.  But, the truth is I’ve been semi-dreading the moment when I have to line up all the reasons I didn’t want to go and the ways I was so greatly mistaken.

It had been five years since I had traveled to visit my grandparents.  In that time, grandma had had a stroke, and to be honest I had done the grandma who says mean things because of her illness and was more than wary of dealing with it all over again.  It’s amazing the excuses we make and build for ourselves when we want to, “too busy at work”, “too busy with Cares”, “too understaffed at work” and “Flagstaff would crumble if I were to leave”.  But with a little encouragement and accompaniment from Zac and a list of rules to keep me out of trouble from my mom (No cleavage, perfume, unladylike language, and shoes in the house), I did what I’d be dreading for months and stepped on that plane.

In a flash it was seven days later and I hugged my family goodbye and walked with Zac down that airport walkway with tears in my eyes at the realization of how wrong I had been.  My time with my grandparents was a time I’ll forever cherish.  There was no moment where I regretted being there.  The days were not as boring as I had been warned they’d be.  We played rummy after breakfast and sat on the porch and talked after dinner.  We played Are You Smarter Than A Fifth Grader? and some other hideous game Zac made us play.  We laughed and listened and reconnected.  One afternoon as I was doing dishes and grandma was showing me where things went, she asked about my job.  After a quick, ‘Wal-Mart’ explanation of what I do, she asked if I liked it.  “I love it,” I gushed.  “Well, it sounds downright scary to me,” she replied with a laugh in her voice, “as long as you’re happy.”

Of course, our worlds were different.  They wake up every morning before six and would prefer if we were up to.  They like cereal and milk in the mornings before my eyes want to open, and quiet, bland restaurants when I like Mexican and Thai.  We both love fish, but they like Friday Fish Fry Dinners at 2pm, and I prefer sushi.  I check my email on my cell phone, and they rock the Earthlink MailStation.  Yet, when it comes down to it, the walls I thought divided us and made our paths uncrossable were just the details that make us unique individuals in this family.

As I look back on my time there, there’s one moment that sticks out.  It was the last afternoon we were there and grandma had disappeared. I walked to the end of the hall to see if she had gone to take a nap, when she appeared out of her bathroom.  She told me she wished we could stay longer but understood I had to go home to work.  We joked about the joys of being an adult and having to pay bills and be responsible.  In a moment of vulnerability, I confessed that I feared I was a much better kid than I was an adult.  She patted my arm and said, “I think you’re doing a mighty fine job at being an adult,” and walked away as I fought back the tears at her approval.  With all of my fear and worry about how my grandmother and I would get along, my time with her was the time I wouldn’t give back for anything.  I’m very aware that both of my grandparents won’t be here forever, but it’s nice (as selfish as it may be) to have happy memories at the end of the story to cling to and carry on with.  Because despite the ups and downs and distance literally and figuratively, we have been and always will be family.